Leaving an abusive relationship is one of the most courageous decisions you’ll ever make. But it also comes with real risks, which is why planning ahead can make a big difference. At Juno, we help women, their children (and their pets) leave safely every day. You don’t have to do it alone. We can help you move and get you all to a place of safety. Or we can work with you on your exit plan to make sure it’s as safe as possible.
Whether you’re ready to go or just starting to think about it, here’s what you need to know to prepare. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed by the information, so you can always read through just a few lines at a time and come back to it later. Don’t think you have to understand it all. Our friendly helpline staff will help you plan step-by-step so that it feels okay, even if it still feels scary. Leaving can feel that way, but it’s still the right thing to do if you are unsafe. And if you have children, even more so.
Make a Safety Plan
A safety plan is a personalised plan to help keep you safer while you’re still in the relationship, when you’re preparing to leave, and once you’ve left. It’s especially important if you’re worried about how your partner will react.
You can create a plan with one of Juno’s support workers and following our advice in this blog: https://junowomensaid.org.uk/how-to-create-a-safety-plan-if-youre-in-an-abusive-relationship/
but here are some basic ideas to start with:
- Keep a list of emergency numbers (like ours!) somewhere safe.
- Choose a code word to use with a friend or family member to signal you need help.
- Know the safest rooms in the house (avoid the kitchen or bathroom during arguments).
- Teach your children how to call 999 if needed – but don’t rely on them for protection.
Even small steps can make a big difference.
Contacting Us Without the Perpetrator Knowing
- We use methods of communicating with you that keep you safe, which the helpline will discuss with you when you contact us. We go to great lengths to make sure the perpetrator of the abuse doesn’t know you are in contact with us.
- You can call us from a Library or a Doctor’s surgery. It can be any Doctor’s surgery – you don’t have to use your own. Ask the receptionist for a quiet room or write on a piece of paper: I need to call a domestic abuse charity. Can you help me do it from here please without letting other people around hear?
- The helpline will help you in covering your tracks. Your calls to us are free and do not show up on any itemised bill. You need to think about your computer or mobile usage though. Clear your history of any sites that may arouse suspicion. Or use computers at the library or at a charity to search the web for what you need.
- See our 3 part series on Staying Safe Online for more detailed information and always remember that our helpline staff can talk you through these details:
- https://junowomensaid.org.uk/what-you-should-know-about-sharing-your-location-online/
- https://junowomensaid.org.uk/how-to-secure-your-devices-a-guide-to-protecting-yourself/
- https://junowomensaid.org.uk/what-is-spyware-and-how-can-you-protect-yourself/
Prepare an Emergency Bag
Have a small bag packed in case you need to leave quickly. Try to keep it hidden in a safe but accessible place or give it to a trusted friend or relative.
This blog gives full details, so follow the ideas here: https://junowomensaid.org.uk/what-to-pack-in-an-emergency-bag-if-you-need-to-leave-quickly/
But briefly, you need to include:
- Important documents (ID, birth certificates, benefits letters, tenancy info)
- Keys (to house, car, workplace)
- Phone and charger
- Some cash
- Medication
- Spare clothes for you and your children
- Any comfort items for your children or pets
If you can’t take everything – don’t worry. Your safety is what matters most.
Find the Courage to Take the Next Step
We know it can feel impossible. You may be scared, unsure, or still hopeful things will change. That’s normal. But if you’re living in fear, it’s time to think about yourself and your loved ones. You all deserve better than a life tainted by fear and abuse.
You are not alone. Thousands of women have left abusive partners and gone on to build safe, happy lives. You can too. And we will help you every step of the way. We promise.
Final Thoughts
Leaving is hard. But staying in fear is harder. Make this the moment you take your life back. You don’t have to do it alone. Juno is here to help you plan, prepare, and move forward safely.
Juno Help
Our helpline is open 24/7, every day of the year. Our staff are friendly, non-judgemental, and understand what you’re going through. We can help you make a plan and leave safely, if that’s what you want to do. There is no pressure from us. And your thoughts on this may change over time. We’re here to help – today, tomorrow, forever.
Calls to our helpline are free from landlines and mobile phones within the UK and do not appear on itemised bills. There is no pressure and everything is confidential.
Helpline: 0808 800 0340
Sometimes our helpline is busy and you might not get through the first time, so please try again. We will always call you back if you leave a message stating it is safe to do so and if you leave us a safe contact number in your message.
If you are hearing impaired, text “Relay/NGT” to 18001 0808 800 0340. This option is available 24-hours a day, 365 days a year.
You can also email us on [email protected] 9 am – 9 pm.
Please note, we may not be able to respond to emails straight away, but will try to reply within 24 hours.
National Help
If you’re further afield, you could contact other charities like Women’s Aid, who have instant messaging and email contact on their websit: https://www.womensaid.org.uk/
The National Domestic Abuse Helpline (0808 2000 247) also provide confidential support. They can help you make a safety plan, find safe housing, and access legal protections.
The deaf health charity Signhealth also runs a domestic abuse support service, DeafHope, using British Sign Language (BSL).
The Survivor’s Trust (for sexual abuse and assault support) – www.thesurvivorstrust.org